Ice Baths, Balls, and the Evil Parking Authority

You know that since this will address the Evil Parking Authority there will be cursing in this post. I am saving it for the end, so if that sort of thing offends you...well, you can stop before we get to it.

These three things named in the title are completely unrelated, one to the other. Hence, they are tangents ...stabbing out into the world from my life. And today is Tuesday. But Triple Tangent Tuesday as a title is so trite. No offense intended if you titled your post thusly today.

First up, the Ice Bath. After Sunday's run, which was my longest run in a few months and doubled my mileage for the month of March even though it was 'only' 6.6 miles, I was feeling pretty thrashed and decided an ice bath was in order. My awesome family had come to retrieve me from my hand-off spot and delivered me to my own vehicle post-haste. (I was lucky enough to get a good walk in between finishing my leg and getting picked up...a nice walk through a questionable part of town but everyone loves a runner wearing a race bib so I encountered nothing but smiles...also lucky for me). My husband hurried home to start an ice bath for me. So thoughtful! The only downside of this was... when the equivalent of a 5-lb bag of ice has been sitting in a tub of cold water for 15 minutes it is WAAYYYY harder to sit your heinie down in the water than if you wait until you're IN the water and THEN add the ice.

See? Major goosebumps...and you can't hear the screeching of bad words...

fortunately, I kept that under my breath...but did say them out loud.

Lesson: always get in before adding the ice!

Next up, the Balls. Why do people do this? We dropped Big G off at his tutor yesterday and this was parked out front of the trendy Berkeley café...

He found this hilarious...that someone would put a ballsack on their car. I found it even more hilarious that they were put on a Volvo station wagon...the absolute ballsiest of cars...not. I especially love how the driver of this Volvo color-coordinated his/her TruckNutz (that is their real name) with the car's exterior...snazzy. And tough. Do you have TruckNutz? What color TruckNutz should I put on my dark grey minivan?

Now for the bit about the Evil Parking Authority...get set... the vile profanity is about to begin...



...are you ready?


Okay.


After the car-nad sighting and dropping G off with his tutor, I decided that the sunshiny day would be perfect for a brief playground outing with the other three kids. We drove a very short distance to a fun park and parked the car here...

view from driver seat...

street sweeping schedule signage peeking out from behind telephone pole...

the identical sign just behind my car (out of view) stated that this was NOT street sweeping day.

We walked across the street to the play structures and had a blast for about 35 minutes. Then it was time to head back to the car. Upon arriving at the car, I noticed a white envelope tucked under my windshield wiper. Yes, a f*cking parking ticket. Issued five minutes before we returned to the car. Nice. I couldn't for the life of me figure out the statement in the 'reason' section...something about 2-hour zone and permit only...we had only been there for 35 minutes! And the resident permit parking areas allow non-permitted vehicles to park for 2 hours...in most places. So then I start walking up and down the street trying to figure this bullsh*t out....truly baffled... and I see this ONE f*cking sign...

...a single, lone sign and it had been neatly obscured from my view by that telephone pole. 

Probably the only BLOCK in Berkeley that has this sign on it...f*ckers.

The City of Berkeley is notorious for overly vigilant, borderline vicious parking officers. The sit near meters that are ticking down and start writing tickets as the driver is climbing into the car. They will watch a driver park in a weirdly signed, ticketable spot and not say a thing...eager to write that ticket and reach their quota. It has created an incredibly hostile parking environment. There are warnings posted on meters and on the officers' vehicles declaring that assault on a parking enforcement officer is a crime and will be punished to the fullest extent of the law. People want to seriously hurt these guys.

Anyway... so I got my ticket, found out why, got in the car, and what was running through my mind? Stupid mutherf*cker assh*le cocks*cker d*ckwad f*ckface b*tches...seriously...what.the.f*ck? Then I realized...my bad. Not healthy to get so f*cking worked up over a missed sign. There was a sign. That officer was just doing his/her job. It was not personal. It was just business. And I broke the rules. Once I was done being angry about the situation, I just felt stupid. I really didn't want to pay $49 for 35 minutes in the park. That's my set of chrome TruckNutz right there.