07 May 2011

These are tying times...

Learning to tie one's own shoes is such a milestone. And tying in its own right is such a useful skill, isn't it?  It liberates one from a tassle loafers lifestyle, enables one to wrap a present with ribbon, give the ability to tie someone else's shoelaces together... it pretty much opens up whole new worlds of foot-fashion, gift-decoration and practical joking.

My son has been resisting the acquisition of this skill. It has not been entirely clear why. Perhaps it is his perfectionist nature? If he can't just do it perfectly right away, no reason to try. Or maybe sheer laziness? Why learn to tie when you can just velcro? It has been frustrating as his mother...as his parents.

Today, I announced that this would be the day. Shoe-tying Lesson Day. And that I'd be dadblamed if this skill were not acquired by Monday morning. This was, of course, met with histrionics... screaming and whining so shrill and unnerving that I was surprised my eardrums didn't burst and blood didn't start dripping down my neck. After attempting to reason with this freaked out mess of a child for way longer than I should have, I did the Bad Mommy thing... I yelled "Shut. UP." And he did :)

I sat his sniveling, snuffling, still-semi-whining behind down next to me with this awesome education tool:


We have had this book for years. If you click on the image and biggify it, you will see the suggested age range on the lower right, near the corner... "ages 4-7". I got it when he was within that age range... SIX YEARS AGO!!!

There was a lot going on in our lives back then when I bought that book... daddy traveling frequently, a new baby in the house, a difficult kindergarten situation... and that "a lot" morphed into "a ton" within two years. The whole teach-the-kid-to-tie-his-shoes thing just sort of went by the wayside :(  I accept full responsibility. And he didn't have any shoe-tying interest of his own... he was more concerned with his self-imposed reading goal of 100 pages a day.

Today, I shouldered that responsibility, and he put his book down.

Today, my 11-year old son learned to tie his own shoes :)


21 comments:

  1. Perhaps I'll send you one of the kids I baby sit before and after school. He'll be 11 in August and can't tie his shoes either.

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  2. Jayda learned to tie her shoes before James did. When he realized she could do it and he couldn't, he wanted to master it that day. Alas, he still has difficulty with it. From what I understand it has to do with his coordination and sensory stuff. We usually stick with velcro too. James is now 12.

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  3. Now you just need to teach him to tie a reef knot so that his shoes won't come undone as easily. I showed my kids the video on Runner's World, and they have all practiced that knot and get mad when they get it wrong now. Good luck, my 7 year old HATES tying her own shoes as well. She says it would be faster if you just did it. (smarty pants!)

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  4. Abi (who is 6) has been tying her shoes since she was 3 and Andrew (who is 3) just learned how to tie is shoes, but me I am 25 years old and I have to hardest time ever when it comes to tying my shoes! so when I buy new ones I tie them once and that is it!

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  5. I love you for two reasons. No, wait, three. One, you're laid back enough and understanding of your individual kids that you were cool with the fact that your 11-year-old couldn't tie his shoes. Two, you're fine telling people about it. And three, you told him to shut it when he threw a fit instead of worrying about hurting his feelings (oh, my poor sensitive baby!). Tell him congrats!

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  6. Congratulations! I really enjoyed this post, despite the stress it caused... ;)

    Baby Talk without the Babble

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  7. They don't make it easy. Cady has yet to have a pair of shoes in her five years of life that has shoelaces. She has nothing to practice on. I guess she needs one of those books.

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  8. Hey....XL...there is this linky thing kinda over it the corner....that says "subscribe" ;-) Of course, I come back to read comments...or at least have them e-mailed to me. Thank you for letting me know though, that is nice to know when you can strike a chord with someone.

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  9. Better late than never. And now he won't ever forget this skill. Mommy task fulfilled. Tick.

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  10. Oh, this cracks me up ...and gives me hope. My 8 year old has been in velcro shoes for years because he can't seem to learn to tie his shoes. He's the smartest little guy I've ever know and he can tie knots out of his knot book like nobodies business...but try to get him to tie a shoe and he panics...so his younger sister helps him out. I guess I should work with him :-)

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  11. This cracked me up! My 12 year old is dyslexic and also has some vision issues. Many, many, many OT's have tried to teach him to no avail and because I too always have a million things on my plate I have not so much given up as kind of secretly hoped it would magically click in for him. Deep down I know that it will require both of us to just bite the bullet and figure it out. (He will have to figure it out, I will have to bite the bullet when he freaks out!!) I know we will both feel better when he finally figures it out! Thanks for the great story! Have a great Mothers day!

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  12. Better late than never as they say!

    Stopping by from Sunday Funday. Happy Mother's Day!

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  13. And this is why I'm all about Velcro or slip on Vans! :)

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  14. I'm convinced the maker of shoelaces is a communist, Nazi, demon whose sole purpose was to drive Mommys INSANE. I have hated teaching my 4 kids to tie their shoes. If it were up to me (Dad has an opinion too... rats), they'd live in slip on Vans and flip flops for life. I'll teach 'em to read and diagram sentences before I want to get into show tying. I just hate it! The whining... the tears... WHY over shoelaces for crying out loud?!
    That being said, it's awesome once they catch on!

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  15. I agree with Sarah. What's up with this shoe tying stuff? Can't my son wear velcro the rest of his life?! :)

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  16. Great topic! Something I am learning with my own children is sometimes milestones are met when the kids are ready, not when we are. -Laverne visiting from Sunday Funday

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  17. I love this because you told your kid to "shut up" AND you admitted it!!!

    Great job and Happy Mothers Day! Stopping by from Sunday Funday!

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  18. My almost 12yo can't tie his shoes either. Well, I take that back. He can tie knots in his shoe laces, but not a bow knot, and he has the hardest time untying the knots he's created. It's often 8 or more knots on top of each other. Someday I will sit him down and show him how to do it!

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  19. You told your kid to shut up? bahahaha! heehee

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  20. Cant you just skip this step and get them some Yankz? I havent tied a pair of shoes in years thanks to that little slice of shoe goodness

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